Neurologist...Smeurologist

I waited a while to update the blog because I was hoping for great things after the neurologist visit.  Needless to say, I'm still waiting.  In the meantime, sit back, grab a beer, and I'll tell you a story about the doctor I fired this week.

Thursday morning, my phone rang and it was MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.)'s office on the other end.  They'd had a cancellation at 2pm and wanted to know if I would like to move my appointment up an hour.  It didn't really matter to me.  The way I've understood doctor's offices to work in the past, they set up all the appointments and then run late.  The later in the day it is, the later they are for your appointment.  One hour isn't much, but I decided it might save me a few extra minutes of waiting.  I had already filled out my new patient forms online, but they requested I arrive at 1:45 pm, so they could get my insurance information.

Of course, I was there at 1:40, insurance card in hand.  I gave it to the receptionist, who gave me a pager and told me a number would light up and to go to that booth where I would get checked in.  You know, kind of like an assembly line.  Awesome.  I sat in the waiting room and waited.  A lady called me over to the booth, verified some of my information, and took my copay.  She then told me to have a seat, and the pager would go off when the nurse was ready to take me back.  I had my seat.  I sat for a long time.  My back hurt.  Bad.  I would estimate it was about a 9.728 on the pain scale.  My pager went off, and I met the nurse past the row of booths.  She told me she had made a mistake and paged me too early.  Please have a seat, and I'll page you again when MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.) is ready.

I sat.  I don't know what time it was when she originally paged me.  I sat there in pain fighting back tears of anger and pain.  It hurt to stand.  It hurt to sit.  I nearly walked out.  I realized I had already paid my $30 and sat here this long, so MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.) was going see me.  I tried to readjust my attitude before my pager went off.  It didn't buzz again until 2:40 p.m.

I gave the nurse my xrays and mri.  She weighed, measured me, and took my temp.  She told me MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.) would be in to see me in a few minutes and to please put on some paper shorts.  They were extremely flattering.  I should have taken a picture for you.  I couldn't stand or sit any longer.  I supined out on the exam table.

MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.) came in, and I sat up while he conducted a short interview...when the pain started, what I had done for it (ibuprofen), who I had seen (Good Doc).  Then he did his exam, which mostly consisted of me pushing and pulling against his hands with various parts of my legs and feet.  He asked me to lie back down, and he lifted my left leg.  I shrieked.  He did the other slower and asked about the pain.  I told him the pain was always on the right.

He sat back on his doctory chair and told me I had a disc problem.  "Really," I said.  "Why wouldn't you think SI Joint?"

I didn't think my question warranted his snarky response.  According to MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.), "Well, as a physician, my medical opinion is that you have a [disc problem]."  (I don't remember exactly what terminology he used.  It was the same old herniation pressing against the nerve story.  I'm not a moron.  I don't need it explained to me a thousand times, but I let him talk).  He then went on to explain the one apparent test for si joint dysfunction that he did, which did not cause pain.  He explained the pain I had when he lifted my legs was indicative of the disc problem.  Yeah, but it's also indicative of an si joint problem.  Then he talked about the MRI and blah blah blah.  So he was deciding to treat my MRI and not my back pain.

I didn't ask the question as a challenge.  I legitimately wanted to know what he had learned from 5 minutes in a room with me that made him so sure.  When MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.) gave me attitude for asking a simple freaking question, we became not friends very quickly in my little bird brain.  As I explained to MrBigShotNeurologist (M.D.), "It's all well and good that you can put M.D. after your name, but you still don't know where my pain is.  If you'd like, I can go ahead and show you now."

As I stood up and turned around to show him, he proceeded to push on the lower part of my back, while asking if it hurt.  "It hurts because you're bouncing me around, but where you're touching doesn't hurt."

Then he showed me where my si joint is.  Like I don't know.  He said, "This is your si joint..."  I interrupted before he got out the crayons to draw me a picture.  I told him, "I know.  And that is where my pain is."  He said maybe I had both a disc problem and si joint problem. 

I have to admit, I didn't listen to much more of what he said.  He offered to treat me with a steroid dose pack or injections.  I did some quick mental acrobatics.  I don't want some idiot poking stuff around in my spine, especially if that isn't where the problem lies.  I have to do something though because this pain is freaking out of control.  I thought if I go for the dose pack, then that should treat the si joint too.  So I got a prescription from him.  I told him about the core exercises I've been doing.  He suggested that I stop and do these dorky easy ones on a piece of paper he gave me.  He walked me out saying how I should call and let him know how it goes.  I said, "Yeah, we'll see."  And that was that.  I didn't actually come out and fire him because I wanted to try this dose pack thing and I'm tired of freaking waiting around for something to get better.

I called my mom to ask her what she thought.  I cried.  She was already angry and frustrated with my sister's recent doctors' appointments.  She listened while I ranted.  I listened while she ranted.  (Lil Sis possibly has compartment syndrome.  She is still in high school and under my parents insurance, which is good for her because without Mom, I don't know if she could navigate all the doctors and stuff.  Shoot, I'm 30 years old and still need my mom's help with this.)

Mom is an RN.  She thinks steroids are the devil but pretty much believes that about most medicine.  She told me it's a miracle drug and will mask the problem, so I have to keep up with pt and treating the actual cause of the pain.  Since this crap has taken over my life though, she said in my shoes, she would try it too.

So I am.  I guess it takes a couple of days to build up or something.  I started the dose pack Friday morning and have seen no improvement yet...